Though it may seem premature, I’m going to go head and predict that eating candied bacon will be one of the most transformative events of my life. It’s a bit like bacon (which it is, you’ll no doubt point out), but it’s oh so much more. It’s also like honey-baked ham, but, as I said before, it’s bacon.
In essence, it’s candied bacon.
Will I eat candied bacon every day? No, of course not. Every week, month, or even every year? Probably not. Why? Well, for one thing, I would end up very fat, more so even than I am now. For another, I get the feeling candied bacon would be a harsh master.
Look, I don’t even want to eat regular bacon, but I do, primarily because it’s bacon. In fact, if karma is an actual thing, I feel sure I’ll have a pig for a boss in another existence.
But this candied bacon. Come on.